church

haven't blogged in ages. been busy. as you know i no longer am involved in the food pantry ministry although i feel i will still be giving food. i am now in teen ministry. i realy like our new teen pastor. sterling key. 21 and on fire for god. he is a great kid and i can see his vision and i am excited. of course it is infancy stage but...........it is going to be exciting. we have a new worship leader who also is a pastor. nick ingles. so technically we have 3 pastors. whoa.....................these two very young men have the joy of the lord. it is evident. the kids will be going to a camp in july and the cost was 250 for each child but the churc payed 100, the parents had to pay 50 and each child ahd to have a sponsor. as of last week i believe all kids are sponsored. justice and destiny will be going from my family and i am excited for what god will do........i am praising him already. our church is growing so fast and the work they have done. my husband is actually involved in much of this and that is totally a god thing. we have the youth pastors office now done and they are nearly finished with the totally refurbished childrens area as we have 33 kids now just in that group. we cannot possibly be staying in this building long. god is moving and the people that i know that have been coming but just havent had that expeience on a personal level are all getting changed right before our eyes. god is faithful and the holy spirit is free to move. it is a wonderful experience. god is awesome and so faithful he is a super cool god. i am still not done with my training, going to take at least till august before i get my license to teach. tedious, but i believe i will like this. justice is winding down for the the playoffs soon in baseball, destiny just had jazz recital. and all the kids are growing. we were looking thru some old videos of all the kids when they were younger. oh my god where have the years gone? and desting she just loved life as a little one. thank god for all he has given us. i am truly blessed and god is good................

been a while

wow. havent blogged as i am busy. work, baseball, training. i resigned my position as head of food pantry, i felt led to resign for awhile, but knew god wanted me to stay to wait for who was to take my place and bring this ministry to the next level. so i am finishing my last month, although i will always help in any capapcity i am needed. i am happy to say rose is our new coordinator with lisa as assistant. i couldnt think of anyone i would feel more at peace to hand it over to. and the vision she has is inspiring. praise god. our church is growing in leaps and bounds, the childrens ministry is on fire and i am thrilled that we now have a youth pastor. sterling key. 21 and on fire for god. july is youth camp and the church is going to pay for most of this. the treasurer is now a paid position. the cleaning of the church is a paid position. man i am in awe of god . pastor kris and his wife are holy spirit led people with a genuine love for people. i do not see how something can not be coming as soon there will be no room for all these people. well i know god doesnt close one door without opening another when we are ready. so what is up ahead for me? i am excited.........waiting with anticipation. i am not on the fence and ready to go. pastor kris's team keeps beating us in our baseball games and i told him today we are sick of getting beat by them. man..................i am excited as warm weather is almost here, and maybe by july i can start teaching classes. they are so far away and to fit the times in my schedule is hard but i am determined. i will still instruct as i feel effective , but teaching will get me out of sitting in that car. i hope i will be effective here. i never realized that i have patience. but i do. i want to see them succeed. but i feel i talk to much. i can get this out with teaching. i am truly a people person. the kids are all doing well, the grandchildren are all growing up and man i am getting older. i would like to say wiser. maybe in some areas, but not a si should be. god will help me. please pray for us, and rose , and lisa as i know this food ministry now called''helping hands'' is going to grow. it is gods will. god bless

marriage encountre 2009

we just got back from the most effective ministry that we as a couple have ever experienced. paul is the one who said when amy first mentioned this experience that was available to us, that he so wanted to go. i agreed not expecting much more than a much needed time away, alone together.for quite a while now, i have put god on the back burner not trusting so much . very dissalussioned with my marriage. i mean heck the last year has been so tough on me, and yes we made it thru and god has moved but i have prayed for a few really important issues and gave god my best so many times and still no results. i feel like for my whole life the enemy had me on his major hit list. and to be honest it got the best of me for awhile. so i attended but not much true participation to the things of god. although looking back god still all the way thru used me. i dont deserve that.......................i cry thinking about my putting the one really true love of mine right on that back burner. i didnt want to be hurt any more i didnt want to fight anymore about things i clearly could not fix, and god he was taking his sweet ole time. at least i believed that. i figured if i just didnt care than no body was gonna hurt me any more. i truly was so hurt inside. all along i could faintly hear god whispering susan i got plans for you. i got big jobs ahead, but yet i couldnt get past the hurt. but this weekend god , in his unfailing, undeserving love for me, answered some of those pressing issues on my heart , and i could not believe it. and still even though i had him on that back burner, thinking oh yeah you want me to stick my neck out there again so i can almost right to the closest edge nearly get my throat cut. enough to feel the blade. of course he doesnt let it happen, but somewhere i lost my faith. oh my god. .....there was one instance at the conference, i was going about my own business and i noticed this younger woman there and how noone befriended her, so i felt the leading to acknowledge her, so even though i was in a hurry and i truly almost didnt listen, i approached her. i just welcomed her as we were walking back to our rooms. she held my hand and i instantly knew she was going to reveal something, and in my mind i thought if i stop i will never be able to finish my journal, after all we only had a certain amount of time. but i looked at her and said are you ok? and she started crying with a deep sob, that i honestly understood that deep hurt. this woman was in pain and i knew what pain was, so i started crying. she revealed that her and her husband came here as a last resort for help for their failing 12 year marriage, 2 children, and her husband told her tonite he was leaving , and this encounter was not going to change this so pack her bags. oh my god i could clearly see this women did not want to divorce this man. i got so holy spirit angry.i prayed with her , and she hugged me and i EXPECTED GOD TO SAVE THIS MARRIAGE. after all oh my god how many families will the enemy get victory over. HE HAD NO RIGHT. WELL THAT NIGHT IN OUR MEETING WHEN WE ALL HAD TO SPEAK GOD DID SOME THINGS IN MY HUSBAND THTA I STILL CANNOT BELIEVE. IN RON DAIGLE,JOHN BARNETT. SO MANY YEARS OF PRAYER. AND ALL ANSWERED IN ONE NIGHT. PRAISE GOD. THEN TO MY SURPRISE THE YOUNG husband stood up and revealed how he was leaving he had enough and god stopped him right in his tracks, these were leaders in their church. he said he had hope now and he was going forward with his wife and family. and then she said she praised god for the true sister in christ that god sent her way .i had so many times in my heart yearned for this, but would not even step out to help anyone. after all what right did i hAVE TO EVEN TRY TO PRAY FOR OTHERS WHEN I PUT GOD ON THE BACK BURNER. but i had to pray for her if god didnt help her she was going to lose her husband, her childen were going to lose their daddy, another victory for the enemy. i didnt care that he was hurling accusations at me, this women needed god to come thru. there was alot at stake. god just totally blew me away. and my husband , i have to shake my head. he is such a good man, and with god he can and will be agreta man. i truly never knew, because of all we put him thru that he loved me thta much. and thta he really thought very highly of me. because of all the negativity i didnt believe that. but i do now. for the first time in a long time. i feel hope. and i amso sorry to god for failing. he is so .good to us, and i clearly did not deserve it. praise god. ,

Martina McBride - Wild Angels

To make you feel my love

Elton John - Sorry Seems To Be The Hardest Word (Live)

one of my favorite elton john

vote

well we had our board vote. a whole new board, and...all men. wow.byron aulick and marc mesereau are the deacoons dick berube and joe mullen are the trustees. any people that have known our body, these are definite changes. one of these people i was totally shocked. and it is not because i dont like this person or feel they are worthy, im just surprised. this whole board vote was bathed in prayer and pastor called a 21 day fast before this for clarity. i know god had his will , and thats all that matters. i did not do this 21 day fast , i tried to be some part of it, but i noticed pastor and his whole family set the example and the standard high ..in love, and alot of the body did it for the first time and god moved in individual lives of some on totally new levels. it was amazing to witness. the faithfullness of god humbles me. on a personal level god is calling me to get off the fence. i definetely learned some things on that old fence. god is god with or with out me. he is so faithful i am truly humbled. i have no excuses for being on that fence. i do not belong there.my calling is no where near that fence and god loves me and wants the best for me to the point of eventually maybe knockinmg me off that fence. i hope to god i just get off myself. pleae pray for me.

february

wow it is almost half way thru feb already. cant believe how time flies. valentines day, my birthday. ooh. presents. i love presents. i just applied for employment with the national traffic safety institute. i am going to try and teach operator retraining classes. the pay is supposed to be better and we are slow at the school, although i will still do this. this means in one or two weeks i am back to studying now for this test. i had such a hard time passing the last one. i will have to study hard to get this. pleae pray for me. you als have to travel all over the tate to do this. ut i will say that gps is a god send. well we have a busy day ahead.

Taylor Swift - Love Story {OFFICIAL}

nice new sound

Whitney Houston - Heartbreak Hotel

oh yeah

gods plan

wow god gave me such a peace about that situation i was praying about. went in and it was fixed before we started. god has a plan..........and no one can touch gods plan. not even me. amazing..................................no hurt no arguing a true honest apology. wow......................praise god.......and i will say i do not think i could be more amazed at the way god has groomed rose for leadership. what plans does he have for her? i just feel i am to encourage her at every turn. she has come such a long way. we all trust her and care deeply for her. her heart is pure. god is good......................................

thinking

wow, this is the first time in ages that i really felt led to blog. i have been thinking alot lately and praying for a specific issue. and course my first reaction to this was ''oh no, this is going to hurt me, how will i address it, without getting emotional. i feel god said ''this is not about you, susan'' ugh,,,,,,i had to take a long hard look at myself. I HAVE SOME DEEP SEATED INFERIOR ISSUES> i didnt think i cared what other people thought but of course i do when i have to be involved in their lives on a regular basis. i sometimes sabatoge the best in my life, by already assuming they dont like me. after all i have so many flaws...............some of them are right in your face..........but the god we serve doesnt have flaws and he takes those very flaws, lets some of them show to the point of nakedness, and somehow if we yield to him and let him, gets glory out of the very thing you would think would be useless. is god amazing or what? but sometimes that means we have to in faith let him take those very flaws, let other people witness them and use us in spite of them. to show it clearly is not us, it is him. i called one of my friends and definite encouragers so much to me in christ., this morning and she shared this dream she had , had and it so reflected my life and my flaws. it spoke clearly to me the issues that god wants to deal with at this moment in my life. i definetely have some issues with authority. and looking back over my life , it is not without reason. . but god doesnt want me to always have these issues. time to deal. ugh........... i need to really know if god approves me it doesnt matter what others think. but i still have to walk in love. i need to really grasp those in authority are people too. and i am not always going to agree, but i still have to walk in love, and if god wants me to do something he will be there with me. iron definetely sharpens iron and every experience is learning ground if i yield to christ in each circumstance. does this mean i wont get hurt, unfortunetely it does not, but god is a god of vindication. if i get hurt he is there to help me get some tougher skin next time. and if he shows me something in time it will prove true. always gottta get out of my comfort zone. i like my comfort zone i like my walls i put up of so far and thats it. i guess god has other plans. may he have his total will.

2009

i know i havent blogged in ages. havent had anything to say. can you believe this? i have to chuckle to myself as i write it. our church is still intact, growing in leaps and bounds. god is awesome. pastor kris says if we focus on salvation, bringing people to jesus, all else will fall in place. he preaches the word, and thats it. he has so much energy and ambition, everything i wouldve wanted in a pastor. holy spirit led, family focused and him and jada totally sold out for christ. i have stayed in the background letting them settle in, and lead. i am in a complacent state of mind. not a good place to be, but god is still speaking thru others to me and in my heart. 2008 was a difficult year and it sure carried over already into this year. i dont understand why god allows some of these things but i have grown. things that wouldve sunk me under in times past, i can walk thru, without feeling like every part of my heart is broken. but i do feel a little disallusioned. i truly believe god is good anyways, and if i press on the future is bright. i have a new computer, and it actually works good. praise god for that as i use it often. since pastor joe left we have had the same people on the board. they must be tired by now. so voting again. i am not so good in church politics. praying god will totally have his way. food pantry is still going and we have reached people on a personal level thru this ministry and some are attending church. praise god. i dont know what the future hold for this ministry but god knows. its been a good ride. we have met so many new people. well work is slow right now as it is winter, i feel change is coming in our lives, i have felt this all year, i dont know what this means, but its going to be big and different and maybe out of my comfort zone. but definetely goood in the long run. i really wonder if we 'll move, and there is nothing to even make me think that in the natural, but we dont always only participate in the natural. i just wanna praise god for a wonderful surprise prayer answered. i have been praying for a few years now about my siblings. dave and john have been not as close in all our lives as i wouldve liked. my grandchildren barely knew them and to me NOT RIGHT. well now justice is on daves basketball team and dave picks him up each week. and we had an all out get together for my moms birthday and it was evident that we all want the same thing. a close knit family. god did a great job answering my prayer. jordan is doing well he has turned into quite the young man. 25 now. laura will be going to school in the spring. and alicia and the kids are fine. she will be 29 in march. oh my god i am getting older....................please pray for me , i need out of this complacency. thanks and cindi HI i always miss you.........hope all is well.